Sunday, December 10, 2006

Beauty E.R.

These answers to your top l0 most common beauty questions are as awesome as an episode of House but without all the drama.

Q: "Before I go to school my hair looks cute. But by the time I get there, it's frizzy! How can I make my hairstyle stay all day?"

--Nicole, 15, Northridge, CA

Blow-dry your hair before bed (sleeping on it tames the poofiness!). In the a.m., apply a dime-sized blob of smoothing serum (try Terax Gloss, $16, to your hair from roots to tips. Wear a silk scarf on your head until you get indoors, then remove it. Voilà--frizz-free hair!

Q: "About four hours after I put it on, my mascara makes dark shadows under my eyes. It looks like I've been punched. What can I do?"

--Rebecca, 18, Myrtle Beach, SC

Try coating just your top lashes with water-resistant mascara (try Maybelline New York Unstoppable Mascara, $7, a drugstores), then apply clear mascara to your lower lashes. Dust loose powder under your eyes to soak up oil.

Q: "How can I hide my freckles without wearing foundation?"

--Candice, 15, Hardyville, KY

One day we hope you'll learn to love your freckles! But in the meantime, tap a mixture of liquid concealer (try Bibo Concealer, $13, and face moisturizer that contains SPF 15 (so your freckles won't darken in the sun) over the spots you want to tone down.

Q: "My cheeks are always red. Is there a way to cover the redness?"

--Rebecca, 15, Courtice, ON

Spread a tinted moisturizer all over, then blend a gold pink blush (try Flirt! I'm Whipped Blush Mousse in Girl Talk $12 over your cheeks. The pink color mutes the red and the light from the shimmer deflects it too.

Q: "What's the best way to shrink the pores on my nose and cover them up?"

--Valerie, 17, San Antonio, TX

Exfoliate three times a week to get the gunk: out (that's why your pores are large). Every morning, spread a pore-minimizing gel (try Almay Pore Minimizer, $7, at drugstores) over your nose before putting on makeup--it will tighten your pores so makeup won't sink into them.

Q: "What can I do get rid of my dark undereye circles once and fat all?"

--Abby 17, Southington, CT

If your circles are brownish, apply a cream or serum with hydroquinone (try Porcelana Skin Lightening Serum, $6, at drug store) twice daily to lighten the pigmentation. If the circles are bluish apply an eye cream with vitamin K (try Jason Vitamin K Plus Crème, $21, Vitamin K helps lighten bruises and other dark spots.

Q: I use a straightener every morning, but no matter what I do, I get short little hairs that Stickup around my face. Help!"

--Kim, 14 Spokane, WA

Your hair is breaking from exposure to high heat. Prevent further breakage by using a heat-protection spray (try VO5! Miracle Mist Heat Defense Conditioning Spray, $4, at drugstores) before you iron. In the meantime smooth broken hairs with a pea-sized amount of hair wax (try Aveda Self Control Hair Styling Stick, $17,

Q: "Every time I wash or brush my hair, it falls out! It's getting a lot thinner."

--Brenda, 14, Aurora, IL

It may seem like a lot, but it's normal to lose 100-200 hairs a day. To ease your mind, try washing with a sensitive shampoo for fine hair (try Nioxin Cleanser, $13, If you notice you're still losing a lot more than the normal amount after about six weeks, see your doctor.

Q: "How do I avoid getting sweat rings on my clothes?"

--Megan, 16, Pittsburgh, PA

Apply a heavy-duty antiperspirant (try Certain Dri Antiperspirant, $6, at drugstores) on dry skin before bed. In the morning, apply your regular antiperspirant. Then stick Garment Guard Disposable Underarm Shields (12 for $23, fabric patches to the pits of your shirts to prevent stains from developing on your clothes.

Q: "My nails peel. How do I make them stronger?"

--Stephanie, 15, Calgary, AB

Keep your cuticles and nails hydrated by massaging olive all into them. Coat them once a week with a strengthening polish (try Sally Hansen Get strong Multi-Vitamin Nail Strengthener, $7, at drugstores). And use an acetone-free polish remover (try Nailtiques Non-Acetone Remover With Aloe Vera, $6, at won't dry your nails.

By Emily Kate Warren

Saturday, December 2, 2006

7 Reasons not to Mess with a Child

A little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher: said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl: stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher: reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher: asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".

A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher: paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

A Sunday school teacher: was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy: (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead. "

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.